The Late Billy Graham - Seller of a Slicker Brand of Snake Oil

I waited to post this out of a sense of holding any invective until he was boxed up before leveling a broadside at the late Billy Graham.

Last Wednesday the gush gate was thrown wide open…gushing tears over the death of 99 year old purveyor of religious snake oil Billy Graham…and gushing sparkling accolades and tributes to his being what idolizers call the 20^th century’s greatest evangelist. I prefer huckster, but what the heck, evangelist, huckster...same thing.

Fox News immediately crowed “It’s a great day in Heaven.” Yes, a great day in Heaven….They actually spend part of their broadcast claiming it was A.GREAT.DAY.IN.HEAVEN!!!

How do they know? By what method can they know this? They do not have any faculties that the rest of us do not have, so please Fox, share with us how you know that it’s a great day in heaven. Flipping through a bible cannot and could not tell you that. You have indicated no apparatus that extends into the supernatural world so you could tap into the “great day festivities.” How are they even sure of Graham’s arrival there? Many Pentecostal preachers and church members will assure you in NO uncertain terms that Graham did not reach the Pearly Gates on Wednesday February 21st, or will he at any time in the future. The same sentiment would also be expressed by the Westboro Baptist Church.

Billy Graham was not a man any of us should revere or embrace. He built his career on being a bamboozler, or what in the old west was called a snake-oil salesman. He made countless open-ended promises that he never had to deliver on, promises built on heresies…scriptural heresies as interpreted from the Roman Catholic and Jewish points of view. Can you imagine what Torquemada of the Inquisition would have done with someone who preached scripture as Graham did?

But more to the point; who gets to determine which bible interpretation is correct? Is it the Presbyterian version? Methodist? Freewill Baptist? Shakers? Holy Rollers? Disciples of Christ? Mormon? Roman Catholic? Eastern Orthodox? Coptic Christian?

Billy Graham grew up in a Presbyterian home but eventually joined the more unruly evangelical Southern Baptist denomination, a group of regressives who objected to and refused to ordain women as ministers, although Graham eventually revised his thinking and said he could accept women’s ordination even though that appears to be in direct contradiction to 1 Timothy 2:11-12. He even initially opposed his own daughter Anne Graham Lotz from teaching a bible class…but later said she was the family’s best preacher. If his god existed, how would he view that statement given it is quite clear in the bible women are not to teach, assume authority over men, and to “learn in quietness”. If preaching is not teaching, what is it?

Fawning revisionist history blathers on about what a good man Billy Graham was when he actually was on the wrong side of history repeatedly. From his theological outlook that included racism, xenophobia, and homophobia, his passing will not wipe away the hate he helped foment that damaged so many lives. In 1993, he suggested that AIDS was punishment from God. “Is AIDS a judgment of God” he said while preaching in Columbus, Ohio. “l cannot be sure, but I think so.”

Graham was notorious for his anti-Semitic opinions. When the Nixon tapes were released, Graham is heard to reiterate an old conspiracy theory that claimed Jewish-Americans had a “stranglehold” on the media that “has got to be broken.” He also condemned gay marriage and targeted transgender people on his website.

.         Graham missed the boat on racial injustice, too, refusing to walk in 1963 with Martin Luther King Jr. in the March on Washington. Why? Because Graham did not subscribe to racial equality, stating on several occasions that little white boys and girls would only walk hand in hand with little black boys and girls “when Christ returned.” There was no sense in working for it until Jesus’ second coming… so equality be damned. It underlines the fact that Graham was a Civil Rights coward.

Graham became known for his revivals but those revivals basically amounted to Christian buzzwords, mild threats of hellfire and damnation, promises of a better world after this one, condemnation of communism…and a request for money. Love of God and country went hand in hand for him as he preached against the Soviets and Chinese, advocated an American way of life that never existed, and reminded people god expected them to give 10% of their income. In short, the perfect Republican. No wonder Richard Nixon and George W. Bush liked him.

Would those same people at Fox who find Graham’s death a cause for celebrating in heaven have accepted it as truth if, say, Al-Jazeera claimed it was a great day in paradise when 19 new martyrs arrived there on the morning of September 11, 2001 after killing hundreds aboard four aircraft and thousands in the Twin Towers and the Pentagon? What’s the difference other than the religion?

I just consulted my Magic 8 Ball and asked if there really was a celebration going on in heaven due to Graham’s arrival. Its answer was “Outlook Not So Good.” And you can believe my Magic 8 Ball because it is as reliable as that information about it being a great day in heaven. The difference is my Magic 8 Ball actually exists.

End of the World - September 23, 2015

              

         Have you said your goodbyes, made your peace, and prepared for the end? According to the latest Christian interpretation of scripture, or maybe cooking the numbers to fit a preconceived outcome they desperately want is a better way to put it, it will happen on September 23, 2015 as described in Acts 2:20 and Revelation 6:12. You want proof? The signs are all over the place.

        The brilliant light falling through the sky that was filmed over Bangkok, Thailand September 7th. It just couldn’t possibly have been a meteor simply burning up in the atmosphere like meteors do every day.

       A huge sand storm swept across the western Middle East September 8^th to 10th, like another did on June 1, 2015, Feb. 10-11, 2015, June 2, 2014, May 7, 2014, April 11-12, 2013…(notice a pattern forming here?) Google the dates and see for yourself. Since this one was larger than usual thanks to less rainfall this year, it is a sure-fire apocalyptic sign. A Christian blogger making a postdiction wrote that “the prophesy that The LORD revealed to me on 19th November 2014, about “a Rain of Sand” coming to the earth, has accurately been fulfilled 10 months later.” I guess God didn't want to rush into things......plus, a rain of sand coming to earth sounds like something originating from above, not from the dry land just to the east of you. He wants to shoehorn this postdiction in among his numerous FAILED predictions as proof that he is one of God’s select.

Allahu Akbar

         The giant crane toppling onto the Grand Mosque in Mecca, Saudi Arabia on September 11^th killing 107 worshipers and injuring hundreds more. Yahweh or Jehovah (we aren’t sure which) was purportedly showing the Muslims that Allah is a false god otherwise He would have protected them. For Americans there’s even the added bonus of it happening on the anniversary of 9/11 so God could show us, 14 years too late, that He’s on our side.

The iridescent cloud seen over the mountains of Costa Rica on September 15^th, even though there was a perfectly understandable meteorological cause. Many people in this predominantly Catholic country claimed it was God letting them know the end is nigh.

The earthquake and tsunami off Chile on September 17th…is proof that God’s face ‘moved over the waters’ as it says in Genesis 1:2.

Pope Francis says homosexuals are not evil, abortion is forgivable, and he visits the communist island nation of Cuba…giving further proof that he is actually the antichrist.

Slavery okay, torture okay, rape and incest okay, two men or two women in love and wanting to marry, that’s not okay.

Ultra-Christian homophobe and hypocrite Kim Davis in Rowan County, Kentucky is jailed for five days in early September for defying a Supreme Court ruling and a U.S. District Judge by refusing to issue marriage licenses to anyone so she doesn’t have to betray her Christian conscience regarding same sex couples. Putting a Christian bigot behind bars is the last straw before God steps in.

Wisconsin governor Scott Walker suspends his presidential race on September 21^st due to low…and I mean really low…polling numbers, which is proof God is prepping him for a quick rapture off the planet so he won’t have to disappoint any of his supporters. (God must like making fools of candidates because didn't He also 'call' Pat Robertson to run for president in 1988?)

And the biggest sign that the end is here…the Cleveland Browns managed to beat the Tennessee Titans 28-14 on Sunday, September 20th. How much more proof do you need?

Well it's a marvelous night for a moondance...

One more thing…there will be a naturally occurring and completely anticipated “Blood Moon” on September 27th-28th when the full moon passes through the Earth's shadow. What this has to do with the end of the world I have no idea but Christians are mentioning it frequently on their websites and in their blogs. I’m betting that nothing will happen on September 23^rd and when it doesn’t the end-of-the-world theorists will shift the focus to this date, claiming they just had the math slightly off. When it doesn’t pan out on the 28th they will select another date somewhere in the near future and keep up the apocalyptic drumbeat. Surely God won’t make them wrong forever…will he?

Remember these predictions that came to pass? Me neither!

(Addendum - September 25th. We are still here...no apocalypse on the 23rd...however, like I wrote above, several Christian websites and blogs, like those of John Hagee, Mark Blitz, and Irvin Baxter, claim the Blood moon on the 27th-28th is an indicator of End Times....Ooooooh, I'm so scared...because this time they got it right.)