Marketing God Less America: How to manipulate the media to your advantage

-One possible scenario-

(Office of Charisma House, a Lake Mary, FL publisher of Christian books, early March 2014)

President of Charisma House: “Marcos, we’re in a slump and need to boost the pre-sales of the book God Less America: Real Stories from the Front Line of the Attack on Traditional Values. Todd Starnes previous books haven't sold well. You’re VP of sales, what do you suggest?”

Marcos: “An incident…and I think I know an angle. Leave it to me.”

Marcos at home: “Kathy, do you have your cellphone handy? Good, we’re gonna make a video. Call Gabriella in here. We were looking for something to justify our pulling her out of that godless public school. I know a way to do it and make them look like the bad guys. Plus, it will get us a ton of great publicity so we can evangelize by using the gullible media. Remember how she said she was told not to play with her food at lunch?”

Kathy nodding and pulling out cellphone: “Gabby, would you come here? Daddy and I want to talk with you about that thing at school where the woman told you to stop what you were doing with your food because it might make a mess?”

Gabriella walks in: “When th' lunch teacher said don’t pway wif my food?”

Marcos, winking at Kathy who starts filming on her cellphone: “That's right. What did the teacher say, Gabby? And 'pway' can have more of an ‘r’ sound…like puray, okay, honey ?”

Gabriella: “She said I coul’n’t puray.”

Marcos: “Over your food?”

Gabriella: ‘Uh-huh, I coul’n’t puray over my food. I said puraying is good. And she said ‘no, it’s not good. It might fall on th’ floor and they'll have to clean…”

Marcos: “That’s fine Gabby, we know what the custodian has to do.”

Kathy: “How did the teacher know you were playing with your food?”

Gabriella: “I was looking under th' table for one of th' grapes I dropped. That’s how she knowed it and tol’ me not to pway any more, ‘cause I had my head down to fin’ it.”

Marcos, looking at Kathy: “So we can say she had her head bowed in prayer, and this woman stopped her."

Gabriella: "She caugh' me again when I looked at the floor again, an' said I coul'n't.”

Kathy: “Thanks, Gabby. You can go and play now.”

Marcos: “I'll edit that and we can put the video on YouTube saying the school is violating her right to pray.”

Kathy: "Well, I don’t like those bullies telling her she can’t even play with her food at the table. Are you going to contact the school first?”

Marcos: “And give them a heads up? No way. We’ll make them come apologize to us. I'll put it online tonight and contact Todd Starnes at Fox News. He’ll love this, plus it’ll help his book!”

Newspaper Reporter on the phone: “Mr. Perez, I’ve seen the video online about your daughter being told not to pray over her lunch at school, and I have some follow-up questions.”

Marcos: “Alright, I’ll try to answer them.”

Reporter: “Did you contact anyone at Carillon Elementary or the Seminole County School Board about this incident?”

Marcos: “No. They know what happened. I believe my daughter. They took away her Constitutional right to pray.”

Reporter: “So you didn’t get any explanation from them as to what might have happened, or if it was a misunderstanding?”

Marcos: “There was no misunderstanding. They abused my daughter, so I’m not going to deal with a bunch of un-American administrators. We pulled her out of the school yesterday.”

Reporter: “Does your daughter know who did this ? Did you tell anyone at the school who it was?”

Marcos: “Well, she gave us a description of who stopped her, but we’re not sharing that information.”

Reporter: “Why not?”

Marcos: “Because it doesn't matter anymore. The school knows denying kids the right to pray is unconstitutional. As my wife said, that staffer should not be working in a public school…but we’ve had enough of their secular attitudes anyway. This just accelerated our decision to home school Gabriella. That’s all I have to say at this time. You can contact my lawyer Jeremiah Dys at the Liberty Institute about anything else.”

Todd on the phone: “Hey Marcos, thanks. I used your daughter’s story on my radio show today. You wouldn’t believe the reaction. People around the country are outraged. This just confirms what my upcoming book is trying to foment. Even though over 80% of Americans say they believe in God, it’s those damned atheists in the schools who are out of touch and driving people away from God. Thanks for posting that video. When it's released, this should push my book to the top of the best sellers list.”

Marcos: “Glad I could help, Todd. We’ll be using your book as part of our daughter’s home schooling curriculum.”

April Fools Day at Charisma House: “Marcos, we’ve seen an 800% increase in pre-orders of the book. Funny, you never mentioned that incident with your daughter before, but no matter, using her was brilliant! The online reaction is massive and every TV station and the newspaper in the country wants to know about the God Less America book. You’re looking at a very hefty bonus in your next paycheck.”

Marcos: “Just doing my job, boss. When it comes to promoting that book, and our faith, nothing is off limits. God wants it that way.”